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While I, Tom was in the hospital recovering from major surgery I had a dream I would like to share with you.
My dream as I remember it began on a ferry boat which had just pulled into port. I was facing away from the dock and very comfortably sitting in a lounge chair on the deck of the ferry. I knew Mary Kay was waiting for me on the dock and I was preparing to leave the ship. There was also a man on the ferry that I could barely see who was moving laboriously toward the dock. He was dressed in brown clothing that appeared to be military in style and it seemed he was suffering from an injury.
When the stranger approached Mary Kay they exchanged greetings and I realized they knew each other. Soon the conversation turned less friendly when Mary Kay realized the man had decided not to get off the boat. He turned and began walking toward an elaborate cage like box that was on the ferry. It looked like a place in which he had been living, a self contained unit. The thought came to me that he was staying in this “cage” because he was injured. It was clear he didn’t want to be seen until he decided it was the right time.
When Mary Kay realized that he was not coming ashore to get help she began a more passionate plea for him to change his mind. He tried to return the conversation back to a friendlier tone but Mary Kay became more and more passionate in her pleas. I had never witnessed or felt such passionate anger from her in the past and I kept wondering, “Who is this guy?” I can’t remember the dialogue, but I will never forget the intensity. He was trying to defend his decision to go back to his safe place, but Mary Kay wouldn’t buy it. Although I couldn’t see her, I knew tears were flowing down her cheeks and her voice sounded desperate. This seemed to be this guy’s last chance to turn his life around. Apparently, Mary Kay had convinced him to come this far, but now he was unwilling to take the final step and walk away from his “cage”.
As my dream ended, Mary Kay was silent and the guy was standing in front of the cage door. I was still in my lounge chair on the deck, but now I had a lot of unanswered questions. Mostly I wanted to know, who that guy was and why Mary Kay was so upset with him.
The next morning Mary Kay came to visit me at the hospital and I shared the dream with her. As I began to tell her the story, I couldn’t wait to see if she would be able to tell me who the stranger was. I had been thinking about it myself but had come up blank. When I completed my narrative, I could tell she knew who the mystery man represented, but I wasn’t prepared for what she would say. Just like King David so very long ago, the words from the prophet Nathan, or in this case Mary Kay, hit me hard. “You are the man” she said.
Although I was still weak from the surgery, Mary Kay and I talked for a long time about what this dream meant. It became obvious to me that this was no “ordinary” dream, but a very true and strong message from God.
I have had some time now to consider this message, and realized that things could not stay the same. I could no longer hide in my own personal cage. I needed to respond to God’s passionate cries to step out of my cage and onto the dock where the healing could begin.
It has taken years to build my cage of protection and fear is the foundation on which it has been built. Fear of rejection and fear of showing weakness contributed greatly. I built the walls with excuses and plans for the future along with anything that would keep me from being exposed. I have lived comfortably in the past and in the future, but avoided living in the present. In my eyes I had built a safe place but Mary Kay and many others were not fooled. God has decided it is time for me to step out of my cage. Apparently it is much more difficult to serve God from inside a cage, so He is beginning the process of breaking down my hiding place and getting me out into the fresh air.
In the story of King David, once he was exposed he confessed his sin and was forgiven. Following David’s example I first sought and found God’s forgiveness. Next I went to Mary Kay, without whom I would not have recognized my sin, then The Village leadership and finally others I knew I had hurt. It feels as though a great burden has been lifted from my shoulders, and now I can start the process of destroying my cage and building a new life that has God in control. | 
